How To Develop Self-Discipline In 3 Easy Steps

By | May 26, 2023

If you want to achieve anything in your life then you’re going to need to develop self-discipline.

It took me a very long time to figure out the exact secrets to self-discipline, especially how to have it in the face of overwhelming temptations, but once I cracked it I took everything in my life to the next level. It’s quite easy too and once you have it you will be unstoppable.

What is Self-Discipline?

Motivation is for when you want to do it, self-discipline is for when you don't - Jay Aldteron
Jay Alderton speaks a lot about discipline > motivation

Discipline is the force that make us do the things that we don’t want to do but have to do. It’s the part of us that says no to unhealthy food when on a diet, or that voice that tells us to get out of bed when the alarm clock goes off.

At its core, self-discipline is the ability to control your feelings and to manage your emotions. Let’s say that your goal is to lose weight, so you plan to wake up earlier to go to the gym before work. When your alarm goes off at 5am, your first thought will be “but if I go to the gym now I will be tired at work” and you’ll seriously consider not going to the gym. This is where self-discipline steps and in reminds you of why you want to go to the gym in the first place.

It is a skill that needs to be developed but it’s a skill that will pay off in every aspect of your life. Disciplined people truly can achieve anything they set their mind onto because they know how to force themselves through the struggle.

The hardest part of developing self-discipline is figuring out how to develop self-discipline. It’s a process that requires a lot of trial and error to find out what works for you and in the end it’ll just click randomly one day but, as I keep saying, the results are worth it.

How to Easily Develop Self-Discipline

The trick to easily develop self-discipline is to make the process as easy as possible. Similar to when you start losing weight, you want to eliminate many of the temptations or distractions that you’ll face before you start.

You’ll also want an initial bigger goal to work towards as this gives you a reason to become disciplined. You can develop self-discipline without a bigger goal, and you’ll still achieve the same effects, but it’ll be much harder. Think of it as a by-product or natural development thanks to working towards the bigger goal. This is to say, don’t say “I’m going to become disciplined and then go to the gym” because you can easily achieve both at once.

Jump in the Shower Whilst It’s warming Up

Just like with most things in life, you want to start developing self-discipline by taking one step at a time.

The best way to do this would be to get into the shower as it’s warming up. Cold showers are a great way to develop self-discipline because it forces you to stay in an uncomfortable situation for a period of time and can be easily incorporated into your daily routine. Cold plunges are also good but require a lot more work to set up so they can come a bit later.

But cold showers are freezing cold, and you won’t last very long your first few times doing them (maybe 30 seconds to 1.5 minutes). If you’re not able to complete a full wash before you get out then it could demotivate you and you’ll potentially stop doing them all together.

By jumping in whilst the showers warming up, you still get the uncomfortable cold, but you also get the relief that comes once the water gets hot. The average shower should take about 20-30 seconds to warm up depending on the day and that’s more than enough time to experience the shock of the cold water. You’ll experience the shock, start dealing with it, and then be used to it (which takes about 15 seconds) by the time the water becomes warm.

Here you’re building discipline by jumping into the cold and knowing that you’re going to experience that cold shock. It doesn’t take any extra time or effort from your day, and it only sucks for a very brief period of time. Better yet, by doing it in the morning you’ll feel like you can achieve anything throughout the day which will improve your mood and will help you achieve more in life.

Have Motivational Thoughts Ready For Tough Times

The painful truth about hard work is that it doesn’t get easier, you just get better. The other truth is that no matter how good you get at something, you will still face tough challenges.

This is why you need to have a motivation quote or phrase ready that you can reference for when you face the tough times. It could be something you’ve heard on a motivation video, or something that’s been said to you, or really anything that keeps you going through hard times.

The most famous example of this would be David Goggin’s screaming “they don’t know me son!” or “who’s going to carry the boats and the logs?” whilst lifting weights. He says this to get him riled up to do keep going even though his body is starting to give him. This energises him and he pushes through the pain.

THEY DON'T KNOW ME SON, who's going to carry the boats and the logs - Qootes from David Goggins
What’s your motivational thoughts?

Your thought could be anything but as long as it motivates you to go through the pain then it’ll work. For me, I think to myself “this is the price of success” and occasionally when I’m really down I add “am I willing to pay it?” to motivate me. The answer is always yes, and I push through whatever challenge I’m facing.

You could also have a specific mental imagine or view of your goal that you can think of to get you through the hard times. For example, if you’re trying to lose weight then imagine yourself walking into a room and having a 6 pack. Think to yourself that if you put in the work now then that will become reality 1 day.

Allow for Small Amounts of Procrastination

Procrastination can be a bad thing but in short bursts it’s a powerful resting period. Think of it like the rest period between sets in the gym. In many areas of life, you need to take a short break away from whatever you’re doing in order to perform at your best.

You don’t always have to do nothing in these breaks. It could be stepping away from your work to make a drink or go to the toilet. It could be simply replying to a text or taking some time to arrange an event with friends. Whatever your break is, it’s a chance to do something else that’s not your current work and therefore gives you a short break from your work. You can even plan these breaks into your schedule by working to checkpoints or by estimating how long each task will take you.

The idea here is to make it easier to do things that suck by giving you a short period of time to collect yourself or figure things out. You won’t want to get into a cold shower but if you take a few minutes beforehand to mentally prepare yourself then you’ll do it. This is also a great time to say your motivational thoughts to yourself which will help you leap into action.

how to not waste time! when procrastinating, make sure to do it in the vicinity of your work so you're always looking at it or being reminded of what you need to do

If you’re working on a long term goal, then taking short breaks stops you from burning out. Working on a website all day sucks but if you take it an hour at a time with 5 minute breaks in between then that’s 5 minutes where you can relax a little. It also allows you to return back to your project with fresh eyes which helps you eliminate mistakes. There’s also the weird universal fact that you’ll solve any problem that you’re facing when you’re not working on that problem.

The Difference Between Self-Discipline and Motivation

What is the difference between self-discipline and motivation? Do you need both or can you survive with just 1?

Motivation is the starting force behind many of your goals. It’s what excites you to start something, and it’s what makes you think about something even when you’re not doing it. It comes from the benefits or end result of your goal and how that could improve your life. At its core, it is the desire to do something amazing to better yourself or to change the world.

Discipline is there for when you’re not excited about your goals. Those days where you didn’t get much sleep or you’re not feeling the best and would rather not put yourself through struggle. Your goals are always going to be harder to achieve than you could ever have imagined and there’s going to be many struggles that completely blindside you. Self-discipline is what keeps you from giving up when faced with hard times.

How to develop a confident mindset
Now that you’re disciplined, why don’t you start by building up your confidence?

You need both motivation and self-discipline to achieve anything in life because they’re 2 sides of the same coin. Motivation will get you started and will help you think of new strategies or ideas to overcome challenges. It’ll be what drives you headfirst into challenges that you know will help you grow once you overcome them.

You then need to self-discipline to keep going through the challenges once the motivation has worn off. When the first attempt fails, and you don’t know what to do next. This is where discipline keeps you to a routine when you have no idea how to solve a problem.

This cycle is on constant repeat until and after you achieve your goals.

Overview

  • Discipline is for when we don’t want to struggle for our goals
  • Start developing self-discipline by getting into the shower whilst it’s warming up
  • Have motivational quotes ready for when the times get tough (which they will)
  • Allow yourself short breaks to rest and come back with new ideas
  • You need both motivation and self-discipline to achieve your goals

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